fix: guild mesh dual-conn uses Holepunch initiator tie-break

Keep/drop sockets with shouldKeepNewConnection, wire peerInfo on
connection handlers, and preserve leave grace for stable peer maps.

index.js

@@ -1716,8 +1716,9 @@ class PearcordGuild extends EventEmitter {
     if (this._meshConnectionHandler) {
       this.swarm.removeListener('connection', this._meshConnectionHandler)
     }
-    this._meshConnectionHandler = (conn) => {
-      this._registerMeshPeer(conn, { emitPeer: true })
+    // Holepunch: connection handler is (socket, peerInfo)
+    this._meshConnectionHandler = (conn, peerInfo) => {
+      this._registerMeshPeer(conn, { emitPeer: true, peerInfo: peerInfo || null })
     }
     this._meshHandlerBound = true
     this.swarm.on('connection', this._meshConnectionHandler)
@@ -1758,25 +1759,40 @@ class PearcordGuild extends EventEmitter {
   _registerMeshPeer (conn, opts = {}) {
     if (!conn?.remotePublicKey) return { peerId: null, isNew: false }
     const emitPeer = opts.emitPeer !== false
+    const peerInfo = opts.peerInfo || null
     const peerId = b4a.toString(conn.remotePublicKey, 'hex')
     const prevConn = this.peers.get(peerId)
     const isReplacement = prevConn && prevConn !== conn
-    // Hyperswarm often opens two sockets; keep the live one and drop the duplicate
-    // so join/leave does not thrash the mesh status and gossip outbox.
+    // Holepunch dual-connection tie-break (same rules as hyperswarm/index.js).
+    const { shouldKeepNewConnection, wireSwarmConnection } = require('pearcord-shared')
+    wireSwarmConnection(conn)
     if (isReplacement && prevConn && !prevConn.destroyed && !prevConn.closed) {
+      const keepNew = shouldKeepNewConnection(prevConn, conn)
+      if (!keepNew) {
+        try {
+          if (typeof prevConn.sendKeepAlive === 'function') prevConn.sendKeepAlive()
+        } catch {
+          // ignore
+        }
+        try {
+          conn.destroy()
+        } catch {
+          // ignore
+        }
+        this._ensureMeshPeerWires(peerId, prevConn)
+        const pending = this._peerLeaveGraceTimers?.get?.(peerId)
+        if (pending) {
+          clearTimeout(pending)
+          this._peerLeaveGraceTimers.delete(peerId)
+        }
+        return { peerId, isNew: false, duplicate: true, peerInfo }
+      }
+      // Keep new: tear down old without emitting leave (swap).
       try {
-        conn.destroy()
+        prevConn.destroy()
       } catch {
         // ignore
       }
-      this._ensureMeshPeerWires(peerId, prevConn)
-      // Cancel a pending leave grace if the peer is still live.
-      const pending = this._peerLeaveGraceTimers?.get?.(peerId)
-      if (pending) {
-        clearTimeout(pending)
-        this._peerLeaveGraceTimers.delete(peerId)
-      }
-      return { peerId, isNew: false, duplicate: true }
     }
     const isNew = !prevConn
     if (isReplacement) {
@@ -1819,12 +1835,12 @@ class PearcordGuild extends EventEmitter {
       })
     }
     if (emitPeer && isNew) {
-      this.emit('peer', { peerId, type: 'join' })
+      this.emit('peer', { peerId, type: 'join', peerInfo })
     } else if (emitPeer && isReplacement) {
       // Soft rewire only — avoid full peer-join handshake storms.
-      this.emit('peer', { peerId, type: 'replace' })
+      this.emit('peer', { peerId, type: 'replace', peerInfo })
     }
-    return { peerId, isNew }
+    return { peerId, isNew, peerInfo }
   }
 
   reconcileMeshConnectionsFromSwarm () {